Wednesday, February 13, 2008

A Tail of Epic Proportions

No, folks, that's not a typo up there. I really mean tail. Let me explain....

It was a dark and snowy evening (really!). As I piloted the mommy-van home from church this evening, I was struggling to see through a foggy windshield - the heavier-by-the-minute snow not aiding me one bit. Suddenly, I see a small, furry animal in the road ahead of me. A million (well, ok, only several) things flashed through my mind at once:
- "Move small, furry animal - I don't want to hurt you!"
- "Outta my way, small, furry animal - I don't want to kill an animal with kids in the car!" Not that I ever want to kill small furries, but my son and I have had lots of talks about Heaven and dying of late, and I am not interested in him being around for the actual moment of death.
- "Ewww, yuck!" - in the event of an actual mommy-van v. small furry encounter.

Yep, you guessed it. After small furry's attempt to get out of my way, and my attempt to not hit small furry by pressing firmly on the brakes and trying to steer around it (darn that foggy windshield and the headlights of oncoming traffic), well, small furry lost. But - can you imagine that there is more to this story?!? Oh, yes! Not only did I hit a small, furry creature while my entire family was riding along with me - small furry was a SKUNK!

Soooo - 2 carwashes later (yes, on a dark and snowy night I took the mommy-van to a touch-free carwash and parked my front wheels over the undercarriage wash until it timed out), a bottle of super-strong odor-eliminator (not just that stuff you get at Target), and 30+ minutes (in the snow) emptying the car of everything that could take on skunk odor, the mommy-van still stinks. I even went out (on a dark and snowy night) to buy a new air filter. Oh, yeah, there is plenty of skunk funk in the AC filter! When I took out the glove compartment to change the filter, the odor was much stronger. However - oh, yeah, still more to story - the directions apparently don't match my particular mommy-van. So, I'll be taking it to the dealer tomorrow to let them change the stinking thing (literally, it stinks!). They will love me. Just in time for Valentine's Day.


Anonymous said...

I absolutely cannot stop laughing. Yeah...funny to me, not to you. :)

RLR said...

Ah - my first posted comment! It was not funny last night, but is a little bit humorous today - now that the stink is only about 20% of what it was last night. I guess I can be thankful that it was cold last night - I can't imagine what hot skunk stink would smell like. Ugh!

Heather said...

"Skunk funk"- I am laughing out loud with this story. How did Jonah take the passing of our furry friend? By the way Patrick can smell skunks a mile away because he grew up with so many around his house.


RLR said...

Patrick probably doesn't want to be withing about 3 blocks of my mommy-van, then. The interior smell is nearly gone, but the outside (passenger-side tires) are still holding on to the skunk funk 5 days, two car washes, and one 300+ mile trip to SC later. Apparently, it has been burned in to the brakes or something.

Thankfully, I don't think Jonah realized that small furry lost in quite that way. He just keeps telling me that everything smells like a skunk....