Tuesday, March 25, 2008

My Days are Really Like This...

This came through my e-mail, and I wanted to share it with you (since I haven't blogged in a while - and now you know why).

If You Give A Mom A Muffin...

If you give a mom a muffin,
She'll want a cup of coffee to go with it.
She'll pour herself some.
The coffee will get spilled by her three year old.
She'll wipe it up.

Wiping the floor, she will find some dirty socks.
She'll remember she has to do some laundry.
When she puts the laundry in the washer,
She'll trip over some snow boots and bump into the freezer.

Bumping into the freezer will remind her that she has to plan dinner for tonight.
She will get out a pound of hamburger.
She will look for her cookbook (101 Things To Make With A Pound Of Hamburger).
The cookbook is sitting under a pile of mail.

She will see the phone bill which is due tomorrow.
She will look for her checkbook.
The checkbook is in her purse that is being dumped out by her two year old.
She'll smell something funny.

She'll change the two year old.
While she is changing the two year old the phone will ring.
Her four year old will answer it and hang up.

She remembers that she wants to phone a friend to come for coffee on Friday.
Thinking of coffee will remind her that she was going to have a cup.
She will pour herself some.

And chances are...
If she has a cup of coffee,
Her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it.

Monday, March 17, 2008

By the Light of the Silvery Moon

I really don't know if there was a moon that night - or if it was silvery - even though I was up most of last Thursday night on into Friday morning. Want to know how my night went? Because I really want to share.... This is what mommy-ing is about sometimes - being the go-to girl at any hour of the night, no matter what the request, and trying not to be cranky about it....

11:45pm - Fall asleep sitting in a chair in the den while trying to catch up on the shows you DVRed because prime time is not ok for children to watch.
2:30am - Wake up in chair, realize bed might be more comfortable, so tiptoe upstairs to get into bed.
2:45am - After changing into pjs, peeling contacts out of tired eyes, and brushing teeth, quietly crawl into bed so as not to wake hubby.
3:00am - Finally get back to sleep.
3:15am - Wake upon hearing footsteps of 4-year-old making his way across the carpet to your bedside. Due to extremely tight tucking-in by Daddy, combined with wiggliness of a 4-year-old (even in his sleep), the sheets have come off of said 4-year-old's bed, and he's requesting that they be fixed so he can go back to sleep.
3:30am - After making bed by the soft glow of a blue fiber-optic "nightlight", return to own bed and try to go back to sleep.
3:45am - Walk to son's room to turn down his CD player. He's listening to a "Between the Lions" story on CD to help him drift back off to sleep - but the whole neighborhood does not need to hear it.
4:00am - Walk to nursery to retrieve howling 20-month-old from her crib. Bring her back to bed with you (no comments on co-sleeping - just not in the mood, folks) to try and get everyone in the house sleeping at the same time.
6:00am - After hours of walking between the master bedroom and the nursery - rocking, bouncing, patting, shh-ing, and trying to get the shrieking toddler in your arms to finally go to sleep, you resign yourself to sleeping upright in the rocker and not trying to put said toddler in the crib when she finally goes to sleep.
6:15am - With snoring toddler still attached, gingerly make way back to master bedroom, put an extra pillow on the bed to maintain a semi-upright position, and slowly, slowly lean back onto pillows to try to get some rest without waking toddler. Remember to set the alarm clock for 20 minutes later that usual so you can get some rest.
6:30am - Drift into tired-but-still-alert mommy-sleep, while trying to figure out how to make up for those extra 20 minutes you are trying to spent asleep.
6:55am - While still asleep, toddler gently rolls from your arms to a comfy spot beside you. Ahh, you can finally rest easy....
7:00am - Alarm clock begins buzzing, after a generous 5 minutes of true sleep. Time to get the preschooler up, dressed, fed, and out the door!

Of course, it's not like this every night. And, truly, I was perplexed about the real reason for all of this unrest. My kids had both just finished a round of antibiotics and seemed to be feeling better. By Friday afternoon, my daughter was running a fever. Only then did the lightbulb come on and I realized my sweet little girl was just not feeling well. For my son the perfectionist, sheets that come off of the bed is a BIG deal - but he can't go to sleep without the tuck-in, either, and Mommy just doesn't do it right. It's good to know that they do rely on others - but good to know that they still need Mommy, too. :)

By the way, if you were doing the math, you realized that I got about 3.5 hours of interrupted sleep. Thankfully it's not like this all the time!

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

How many teacups?

The world of my son, it seems, revolves around numbers. If I'm working in the office and he wants some one-on-one he will ask, "What number of minutes until we can have some mommy and me time?" If I'm putting him down for some nap/quiet time, he asks, "What number is it when I can get up?" That's his way of asking "What time...?" - that is, what number he needs to look for on the clock beside his bed (so he can get up without being asked to return to bed....). And, of course, the age-related numbers - like asking, "What number are you?" for "How old are you?" He has some interesting thoughts on growing older, such as, "When I get 13 years old, I can drink coffee." And, the most interesting number theories of late have to do with the dispensing of medicine. As I mentioned earlier, the kids have ear infections. My son comes up with a different dosing suggestion each time he has to take his medicine. The best one, so far, is, "The doctor told me I have to take 14 teacups." Really now, let's knock out that infection so it NEVER comes back! I am certainly glad I don't have to force down their single-teaspoon-or-less doses. They have not always been easy to medicate - and that's not so far in the past I don't remember. But 14 teacups? What a hoot!


Illness is not fun. If you don't believe me, just come to my house. Well, not today, everyone is on the mend. Come to my house two days ago. My son had a fever and told me his body was hurting. Look at the alligator below - he's FOUR. That's not something you expect to hear from a 4 year old. My daughter was just generally cranky, with congestion and a runny nose (that was no longer running clear....). Her history goes like this - get a runny nose, get congested, drainage changes color, get ear infection. Every time. No exceptions. Husband and I have been swapping off childcare duty for four days now. I'm so grateful he can do some of his work from home! (Did I mention that all the while, his car has been in for a major repair, so we have managed to swing the childcare, working from home, and one of the busiest weeks of my year while sharing a mommy-van?!? Yep, we rock! I know he's working from home, but we still have to go places!)

So, yesterday, I call the ped for an afternoon appointment. For two kids. I just hoped that the nurse would come up with a time that was after nap, since my kiddos really needed the rest. 4pm - jackpot! Of course, when we get there, the kids are happy and well-behaved. Typical.... Until after my son's strep test. He did well with that one - but when he figured out the flu test involved his nose, well, let's just say he wasn't as agreeable as I'd have liked.... I hate having to wrestle my kids onto the exam table and hold them down. It's just not cool. And he's 40 pounds now - a good workout, I suppose.... He "passed" both tests - he only has an ear infection and perhaps a random virus that caused the other symptoms. As for my daughter - well, I already told you what to expect, and I was right.

They have been on antibiotics for 24+ hours now, are feeling better, are fever-free, and are going back to preschool tomorrow! And, my husband's car is back from the repair shop, so I have the mommy-van all to myself again. All is right in my world again (ha!).


Kids say the funniest things. I know that you already knew that, but we have had some humdingers here lately. For one thing, my son has had some problems with using potty words on the playground at preschool. So, as you can imagine, we have instituted the "no potty words unless you are in the bathroom" rule around here. I got called out on that one today. Let me defend myself by saying that I was in the laundry room while putting clothes in the wash, talking about poop on some clothing, and my son heard me say it from two rooms away. How come his hearing isn't that good when I ask him to pick up his toys?

My daughter is chattier by the hour, it seems. She, who frequently refers to animals by the sounds they make, began shouting "doggy! doggy! DOGGY!" from her second row perch in the mommy-van this morning. Any other day, I would have heard "Arf, arf, woof, arf, woof, ...." But today, another new word. Hooray! Her enunciation is pretty good - she even managed "den-ist" yesterday. There are still, however, some cute "misses":
Buh-T = bite OR book
ah-pohw = apple OR hippo
doh-wa = Dora, OR an attempt to say her brother's name

Another fun thing kids do with words - using a word or figure of speech in a manner that's not quite right. Last night, I told my daughter to "drink up" as she was ... slowly ... drinking ... her ... cup ... of water after brushing her teeth. She promptly threw back as if she was downing a tequila shot..... Look at the little fairy counter below - that's how young she is - and she took me literally. Just too funny! My son keeps telling me when he's sick that he needs to go to the dentist - not sure how he confused that one with the doctor - you know, the one with the "skefo-scope"!

An alternative to misusing the figure of speech is totally misunderstanding it, and then using it anyway. My son's current favorite - and we just play along - is, "I'm gonna take your attention!!!!" What does it mean? Excellent question! Where'd he learn it? No idea. I even asked the preschool teacher. Really, we have no idea. In what manner does he use it? It's sort of equivalent to "I'm gonna beat you!" (in the racing sense of the phrase). Mainly, we hear it in the car. He jumps into his booster seat, yells, "I'm gonna take your attention!" and the race to be the first to buckle in is ON! Of course he wins - I'm always busy buckling in may daughter (who is saying "no, no" or "bah-kul" depending on her mood). The good news is that this has been going on for weeks now, and he's still just as excited about it every time - now I need to try it out at clean-up time!!!