If you are a regular reader, you have probably noticed quite a few changes on my blog lately. There's a new layout, a new seasonal background, and a new counter to log the number of visitors. One of the earliest, yet least noticeable, changes in this round was adding some blogs to my Blogs I Read list. One of those was The BIG "C" - which is my dad's blog. It's about "Living and working with cancer. A (sometimes) lighthearted approach to things in life."
If you are a regular reader, you know that my blog is always full of newsy stuff. It's a way to reach out to our family and friends and share news. My dad's diagnosis with lung cancer was some pretty big news, but this is the first time I've blogged about it. Why? Well, there are a hundred reasons why, but mostly fear. Not just fear about what might happen to my dad, but fear that if I put it out there for all to read, it would make it that much more "real." I emailed a few close friends, put Daddy on the prayer list at our church, and said my own prayers whenever I thought about him. I didn't talk about it around the children; in fact, I rarely spoke about it face-to-face with anyone. It was just too hard. And even though he recently got some really good news, I am still tearing up as I type this.
I don't think I was quite ready to share my personal struggles, even with my regular readers, and I'm sorry. Although this is my space to share funny stories and "I wish I'd thought of that!" mom advice, it's also where I share my struggles. This has been one big struggle, and I shouldn't have forgotten that you are all willing to share the burdens, as well as the triumphs, with me.
Daddy - I love you!